A Lover’s Woes
I live, but for what
reason? when you are no longer with me. A part of me
wanted to end my life when you left but a larger part of me wanted to stay put in this horrible world with the hope of your return. For many nights I waited, not even a shadow of yours showed up to greet me upon my woes. Perhaps you had moved on and started to live a life that doesn’t include me or perhaps you are halfway in your journey back to me. What have I done wrong? What drove you to leave? Is it because of the fact that I loved you so? Just answer me, yes or no. You were always my priority; I had always made sure that you were treated well. I thought we shared something special, a bond that cannot be easily broken down? I guess I was not fully awake when I thought of it that way. I was enough for you before, what modified it all? Is it my way of approach? Had I been horrible to you? When you told me that you loved me, were you saying the truth? You mean the world to me---you mean everything to me. You were the person whom I wanted to spend the
rest of my life with. You were the one whom I wanted to share my sadness and happiness, my failures and successes with. I gave you everything you had ever needed and wanted, I pleased your every expectation and clothed your every fantasy only to find out that I was never in your
heart. You were with me through every difficulty, through every challenge and we always came out as victors. “We’re in this together”, that was what you vowed to me. For several years you stood by that but what happened one distressed night? You left me and I let you go without a fight. That was stupid of me and that was unpredictable of you. A match made in heaven that was what we were, you were my soul mate and I was yours. We were lovers, two people who had each other’s heart, each filled with promises of
Love that was to last forever. I guess, they were right, promises were meant to be broken. Questions still linger my head, piercing my heart with every word like a sword. Where are you and why did you leave? Do you love me? Will you ever come back? Was I not enough reason for you to stay? I
shall wait for your answers come what may. A Response
I close my
eyes and dream of nothing more but to be with you but as much as I would like to return to you now, I have something really important to do. Rest assured, do you still remember my vow? “We’re in this together.” I’m taking a break from it. This is something that I must do alone. Don’t worry, this will not take forever. Sometimes, there are roads in life that we must venture by ourselves; I know that you will understand because those eleven year old kids who met in a train compartment had long gone. I’m only searching for the things that I should be. Promise me, that you will wait for me. When I come back I wish to see you reaching out to hold my hand. I want to see the longing in your eyes. I want to feel the love that you bestowed in my heart. Through all those fights I stood by you, what more do you want me to do just to prove that my love is true? Still, I am open to all possibilities and if destiny would come to defy me and I would be too late then I shall spend the rest of my life regretting about the misery I had entered into. Every night I will be wishing upon each star and I will be wondering whether we are under the same night sky. If ever our paths would cross again, I will be looking into those deep green eyes and be once again entranced by their spell. Then I shall remember everything that had once been. The memory of your kiss shall once again haunt me and the remembrance of your smile shall once again captivate me. And in this empty world, I shall find a new reason to live and that reason would be you; the very same reason why all those years ago I had felt the sensation of being in love. Now, do you see? My life involves on no one else but you. The whole world may turn its back on you and other people may just pass bybut I can assure you that I will stay. Even when you would push me away I will stand firm beside you because I know that innocent young school boy still lingers beneath that angered and worried face of yours. I know that in the end our love will prevail and will once again be the one to sustain your life just like how your mother’s love saved you from death almost seventeen years ago. emma_radcliffe
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