To live life is to struggle, and persevere through all things in this world that wish to bring you down. Sometimes only a book can get you through the times where you feel so alone, and are welcoming the grim reaper for dinner. Sometimes such a loner activity to partake in, like reading a book by yourself is, the only thing that makes you feel connected to every molecule in the whole world and every person in it. This is the feeling I got, a feeling of connection to the author and to the people I imagined reading the same book I was.
The story, which is a memoir, is that of a lost troubled soul which many of us can relate to. It's the story of boy who at such a young age had a realization of how terrible this world is, and at this young age, of around 5 I believe, he wished for death. He kept a knife underneath his porch, and the security of knowing there was someway out of this torture known as his life was right under the place some families sit around chatting about past Christmas's. But not his family. His parents were divorced, which again is something many can relate to. His mother lived in California and his father some state nearing the mid-west of America.
He acquired a lifestyle headed for ill fate, and a way of life that many can't relate to or understand how someone could do these things to 'themselves'. The fact is, it that we are responsible for each other
. He, his parents, the media, random people on the streets, and the bugs that bit him on hot summer days were all responsible for this lifestyle we can't understand. And after hitting the bottom, the realization that death is not an answer, he starts searching for other options to help cope with the reality of the world.
He was not a religious person; he was not a lot of things, so there were plenty of things to try.
He went through a punk rock druggie life, to a straightedge life, back to a party life, then to a soul searcher. This angry punk rocker began to meditate in prison to escape the walls around him. His father was into this sort of thing, and tried hard to expose his son to it. Of course, like most of us have experienced, Noah had to figure out on his own how the advice given by his father could improve his life.
And even after he started getting into meditation, then religion, and after meeting the Dali Lama, and persevering through many losses, he still feels this burning emptiness that drives one to search or to die. More we can relate to. The emptiness, the feeling that something is missing, that some of us admit to, and other's hide with work and hobbies, and titles, and money. And he realizes he needs to accept this, he can't meditate it away, but he can't drown in the pain that it brings. He comes to master the two worlds of light and dark, and mixes them into a beautiful dance of hues, like a ying yang.
He finds the fine line he must walk between happiness and despair.