My beloved parents had a very ordinary beginning indeed;But they had been very caring, particularly my respected Babujee.I
feel I knew his mind,realized what he felt and what he wished to get in life.He had been a simple man of a God approaching nature, miles away from the crafty ways of the society of his times.He has been an ideal for me to follow. And as for my beloved mother, I have no words to describe her. Her sense of dutifulness and of service to all that had a time to reach for her blessings were really a unique experience to us.
Even during her hours of illness, she attended to her duties without any feelings of hesitation or distress. It was she who gave us the quality to love others, inspite of any personal preoccupations. She was such an ideal for us that the life of which I have yet to come by.
I know this is my first time that I have been made to stay away from you all but I always feel,you are with me, and I am with you.
My
children,your progress in life is my only dream and I know you will not betray me.I have always had the dream that you will
achieve in life,what I wished to but could not get. Agreed,I was not very sincere about it but I had the desire and the ability to achieve it. I am sure about it .But you , I hope,I have given everything out at stake, everything needed ,everything required for making a head way and a solid start. Now, therefore my children, it has come upon you as a sacred duty to achieve what your father just somehow failed to do.
If I just peep into a period of my 50 years of life so far,I get only faltered, because of my lethargy and not for anything else. There was sincerity all right, but no determination, no perseverance, no convictions, no confidence and of course no coaxing at all. I could have made any grade given of course, the most needed direction. I blame; but only myself for, I could have done it with a little more effort. So ,my kids, I call upon you, I exhort you to come up and to do some thing which adds to the name of that one man, that father of mine, that Babu Vishnu Swarup, who had all the dreams in his eyes, but who could not eventually visualize what he intended to fulfill or for that matter, what I, for myself ever aspired to achieve.
My dear children, my sons and daughters, you owe me a grave responsibility, a very heavy one to bear, you have to accomplish what I failed to do despite my aspirations to do so.
My children, you all have the acumen to make any new stride in life, or to reach a milestone of note.
Although, i know I shall not leave any thing extraordinary for you to bank upon ,but my dear children, I shall certainly bequeath for you a legacy of lofty ideas and of unbiased sacred values. And upon that you can build up your edifice as high as you wish to do.
My philosophy in life has been to avoid confrontation although that way ,I had sometimes to deal with situations ,In which it was not very safe or solid,but I always found myself wanting as far as the tact to manipulate matters to achieve success was concerned. On that account my heart aches with repentence but to no avail. I can not now at this stage, make any amends to what I have already done. But I can assure you ,all that I have been able to achieve so far despite my fragility,is all due to your Mummy’s courage and boldness, her sagacity and wisdom, her tact and approach. There can not be any two opinions about her unique qualities. She is a gem among women, a remarkably unique being. She has been an asset in my life. Without her , all that you find, would never have been at all .
She is so nice to me even though I deserve nothing at all. Nothing to hide.
I wished so many things to achieve but something was lacking in me, and that something is so obvious to all by now. Lack of determination, lack of conviction, lack of self confidence. And all this combined together , marred my career, or else ,I would have given you all a present and also a future which would have been a matter of envy to all that matter.