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Shvoong Home>Books>How To & Self Help>My Private Hell: Struggle & Survival Review

My Private Hell: Struggle & Survival

Book Review   by:Gail     Original Author: Gail Fonda
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This book is invaluable for anyone who has problems of any kind. I think that
would include everyone alive! This is a memoir/self-help book that explains in
riveting detail the horrific side effects of growing up in a loveless, dysfunctional
family. The parents showed no warmth, only coldness and verbal abuse.

The effect on a person in that type of environment resulted in nervous illness,
anxiety, depression, low self-esteem and more health problems. I chose bad
people who abused me in every kind of way because I didn't know any better. Without realizing it, I chose human beings to have relationships with who mimicked the ones
I lived with from childhood through becoming an adult.

I actually never really became an adult because I had no social skills to go out into the world with as most other normal people would know automatically. I very slowly had to find my way in life, and it was extremely difficult.

At a physicans' recommendation, I began to exercise. I started slowly and then gradually moved into more difficult routines. I now love spinning classes, bench classes, high impact aerobics and weight-training, though I've tried other avenues, such as swimming and tennis, which I didn't do very well with. That didn't matter.

I found that regular, daily exercise boost my spirits, gave me energy, strengthened me against such things as colds and flu, and most importantly, improved my negative attitude. It's a must-read for anyone who has a stressful life. It's also helpful for alleviating migraines, high blood pressure and even hot flashes.

I started exercising over 20 years ago, first through adult education, then with "Jazzercise", then with a women-only storefront exercise club. After I got bored with those venues, I needed to move on. And I also became more athletic and began to surpass the other people in those facilities. I joined full-time health clubs open seven days a week with all-day exercise classes. The classes were as variable as the teachers. And the teachers used a variety of musical styles to motivate us. I was hooked.

And I've been doing this for a really long time. From time to time I've had some bruises and injuries, but that's to be expected when you're moving your body all over the place. I would temporarily slow it down but I'd never stop. When I had major surgery, I was forced to stop exercising for six weeks and I despised that. Plus, I had to very slowly work my way back up to my original daily exercise plan.

After years of exercising, it improved my personal feelings about myself so much so that I was able to enter into a normal relationship with someone, something I'd never experienced before. At the age of 37, I finally found the perfect mate, after having wasted many years in many bad relationships. I had a college boyfriend for all four years who I would describe as a womanizer, but I clung to him, knowing he was never going to be with just me.

I then had a one-year abusive relationship, then a seven-year abusive relationship, then another four-year abusive relationship. All of those men had many things in common. They were all verbally, physically and emotionally abusive to me, just as my mother and brother had been to me.

Regular exercise isn't just for maintaining a healthy weight, which of course, in this obese society is of utmost importance. It actually saved my life!
Published: July 13, 2005   
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