Joke
of the Month : A
man is working on the buses in the US collecting
tickets.
He rings the bell for the driver to set off when there''s
a woman half getting on the bus. The driver sets off,
the woman falls from the bus and is killed. At the trial
the man is
sent down for murder and seeing as it''s Texas
he''s sent to the electric
chair. On the day of his execution
he''s
sat in the chair and the
executioner grants him a
final wish.
"Well" says the man, "is that your packed
lunch over there?" "Yes" answers the executioner. "Can
I have that green
banana?"
The executioner gives the man his green banana and waits
till he''s eaten it. When the man''s finished, the executioner
flips the switch sending hundreds of thousands of volts
through the man. When the smoke clears the man is still
alive. The executioner can''t believe it.
"Can I go?" the man asks. "I suppose
so" says the executioner, "that''s never happened
before."
The man leaves and eventually gets a job back on the
buses selling tickets. Again he rings the bell for the
driver to go when people are still getting on. A man falls
under the wheels and is killed. The
bloke is sent down
for murder again and sent to the electric chair. The executioner
is determined to do it right this time so rigs the chair
up to the electric supply for the whole of Texas.
The bloke is again sat in the chair. "What is your
final wish?" asks the executioner. "Can I have
that green banana in your packed lunch ?" says the
condemned man. The executioner sighs and reluctantly gives
up his banana. The bloke eats the banana all up and the
executioner flips the switch. Millions of volts course
through the chair blacking out Texas. When the smoke clears
the man is still sat there smiling in the
chair. The executioner can''t believe it and lets the man
go.
Well, would you believe, the bloke gets his job back
on the buses. Once again he rings the bell whilst passengers
are still getting on, this
time killing three of them. He is sent to the electric
chair again. The executioner rigs up all United States
electricity supply to The chair, determined to get his
man this time. The man sits down in the chair smiling.
"What''s your final wish ?" asks the executioner. "Well" says
the man, "Can I have that green banana out of your
packed lunch.?" The executioner hands over his banana
and the man eats it all, skin included. The executioner
pulls the handle and a brazillion volts go through the
chair. When the smoke rises the man is still sat there
alive without even a burn mark.
"I give up" says the executioner, "I
don''t understand how you
can still be alive after all that?". He stroked his
chin. "It''s something to do with that green banana
isn''t it" he asked.
Nahh" said the bloke,
"I''m just a really bad conductor"
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