Human relationships are the source of most of
life''s
pleasure and pain. This shares some ideas and strategies which can give you more pleasure and less pain!
You may have had the occasional thought aboput an acquaintance . . .
"It''s impossible not to argue with that person" or "I dont know how to talk to this woman!" there are options for dealing with these
people that you may not have tried, and we''ll take a look at these.
We always have choices in how we deal with others, but most of us lapse into famliarn ruts and patterns.
You will know some people who seem to be able to talk to anybody. They meet someone in a restaurant and you automatically figure that they have been lifelong buddies. You say, "How long have you known each other?" and they say, "We''ve never met before."
These unique individuals are not born lucky - they simply use skills, they have a particular awareness, and it can be developed.
Certain things are no fun to do alone.
Have you ever tried having a party by yourself?
Things like watching movies, eating dinner, playing cards, driving to work, fixing problems, planning vacations - and going on them - things like moving house,
making plans. . . and having parties, need company - the people you are about.
A joyous life is one filled with friendships. Imagine losing your job, or your money, or your fancy car... no doubt you''d survive. But losing your closest
friends, is a
different matter.
Our happiness hinges on attitude - or attitude toward ourselves, work, effort, goals, our response to failure, disapointment, pleasure, pain and the whole life puzzel.
There are no simple formulae for making friends,Certainly it takes more than a healthy self-esteem and good table manners to earn the trust of others. There''s a balance between give and take, between duty to oneself to others. And then there''s generosity, sensitivity, good humour, a little wisdom.Our world is made of lawyers. We have the inside world - friends and family; the outside world - bosses and bank managers; and the occasional extra-terrrestrial - salesmen at the door and . . .
Different people require different treatmernt. (You don''t treat your boss like you treat your wife.) Nevertheless, we seek a tranquil coexistence with people from all lawyers.
Everything is always up for review - companies analyse returns and change their strategiesaccordingly. We should do thesame (with ourselves). Take stock. ask ourselves: what am i
doing and is it enriching my life?
Take Fred, who has all the trendy gear. Armani shirt, Cardin suit, Gucci shoes, and a concertina of credit cards. He''s got a gold watch in his arm and a matching porsche in the garage. And he might argue that he''s doing everything "right." but Fred micht to ask himself, "If im doing all the right things, where are my real friends? How is it that Barry in his battered old toyota is getting all the laughs and scoring with the ladies?"
Like Fred, we can benifit by asking ourselves some relevant questions, like . . . "Am I reliable? Do I feel superior? Do I feel inferior? An i running scared? Do i take myself too seriously? Can I laugh at my self? Do i listen? Am I responsible? Am I a fun person to be around, or do I bore everyone to death?
The first lesson of friendship is:
IF YOU WANT FRIENDSHIP, YOU MUST BE A FRIEND FIRST.
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