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First of all, the title is all wrong. It
doesn’t describe the contents at all. The title ought to be “Life Wisdom” or
“Things I Learned As a Healer and as a
Patient”. The
author is a physician who now works as a professor and therapist. She comes from
a long line of doctors. Traditional doctors. She got a
degree in philosophy but then entered medical school and became an M.D. There
was much about traditional, Western medicine that disturbed her. Her journey
took her from that to practicing as a therapist, particularly with physicians.
The book is a story where each chapter (they’re short) are fables that make a
point and tell a story. She talks about things she’s learned
from others and things she’s taught others. She has obviously explored Buddhism
and alternative forms of healing.
One story is about a patient who is
ruthless and driven and successful in business but is miserable. Once the author
hears the patient’s story—which is brutal and horrible, starting with being
separated from parents and family at the age of 4 in Vietnam—and includes living
in the streets and stealing to live. Her whole life has become this ruthless
fight for survival. The author tells her, at one point (after having listened to
the patient’s whole, terrible story without judgment), “You have survived”. As
in, you don’t have to fight so hard any more,
you have survived and will continue to do so. It was only after a few
weeks, and some dreams involving roses, that the patient realized that
she had lost her heart, but that it was still there. It was waiting for
her to come back to it. Her life could become less about the fight for
survival and could become something new and startling. The behavior you
learn, as a child, to cope with trauma or events in your life are not
necessarily good behaviors for your as an adult. This author wisely
guides her patients through a process of healing.
The stories are varied but each one
will touch you and/or teach you. I wish I were filthy rich and could give a copy
to each physician I meet (because a lot of stories revolve around them and their
practices, but not all) as well as all my friends. It’s just a very good, wise
book about life. We can all learn something from this very insightful book and I highly recommend
it.