A Rayah
Bill Gates Rescues Internet
Humor
President William Jefferson Clinton and Vice President
Al "Macarena" Gore jointly
announced that a major
crisis has arisen on the Internet. The
National Bureau of
Standards and the Federal Reserve Board have calculated
that all jokes and parodies that can be developed, have
already been released, and there is no more new humor
available for Internet circulation.
Bill Gates, second most powerful American, announced
that Microsoft would be
recirculating all
old jokes from
their corporate repository. "We had intended to issue this
as a Microhumor CD", Mr. Gates announced, "but in view of
this national crisis, we are recirculating these old
chestnuts in the hope that they will amuse once again."
Microsoft will ensure that each joke is rated according to
age suitability.
President Clinton praised the generosity of Mr. Gates
and said, "Decent Americans everywhere will pray silently
that new humor can be developed soon, and spread over the
Net. In the meantime, as we have always done in times of
crisis, the Federal government will work diligently to
avoid a humor gap."
Senate Majority Leader Newt Gingrich observed, "This is
the sort of thing that the Democratic party always does:
use up all the resources without knowing how to replace
them." He also stated that a strong national defense was
even more important at such times.
Long time Senator Strom Thurmond asked, "What's the
Internet, sonny?"
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