I''ve been working a lot lately. I have
colleagues who have been working even harder then I am; on average they''ve worked almost 20 hours a day on average. And myself? There was a stretch I was working 16 hours for a straight 18 days.
If I told this to my fellow colleagues, they would think it''s normal. I understand this is nothing to complaint about. However, recently I''ve been working with a senior who has given us (our team on SSC) good advice. We have to think of our career for the next 30 years and not just the next promotion. If we let ourselves burnt out when we are young, we''ll end up hating the
job and the
profession altogether. I do not wish that to happen.
But of course, we have to know when we should put in the extra effort so that we can meet deadlines. I tried and I am still trying to work the extra hours; I think I am still not used to the late-night work culture, so there would be times where I would just leave everything "on the table" for the day and head
home to get some rest and to be just by myself; to me, "me-time" is relatively important, it helps me to balance up myself and to recharge my mental energy.
I still want to be "interested" in my current job, for many reasons: There''s so much to learn, though the pressure is high. It pays for my bills, my sis''s future education and my mom''s lifetime medical bills.
Each time when I find myself getting "sick" of the job, I would allow myself to have a break. As the old saying goes, rest is still allowing ourselves to be able to walk further. Each morning I would chant and pray to the Goddess of Mercy to allow myself to be able to focus on the job and get the task done.
That''s the job aspect of my life. And each time when I allow myself to rest, tears would flow down from my eyes. It''s like saying, ah finally I get to rest a little.
I''ve never missed home that much in my life. I guess when I was working in KL, it felt more at home. So I went back for some long weekends, mother''s day. I''m not a person who spends much; but I''m more than willing to spend on my family. I bought Ma a hand
phone coz she has wanted one for long. Then it was Mother''s day, I booked a private room for the family in a Chinese restaurant. I bought my family meals and paid for all sorts of things when I went home. This is all possible because I am working here.
I know I''ve cried a few times over a short 3 months time that I am here. Cried over exhaustion; cried over accusations by superiors; cried because I missed home. I have fallen sick a few times. Doctor said that I have a weak heart; that''s why I get breathlessness whenever I am too tired. So I asked myself if all these are worth it. I can say that I will try my best within my
physical ability. I will not risk too much of my health to a stage where I would not be able to work anymore.
A master always advice me to use your heart in all that you do.
I guess that''s all for the time. Thank you for spending time reading my heart.
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