What to
do when you are Provoked?
The provocation i
have wrote is about being called a
prostitute. Merriam
Webster
defines a
prostitute as ' to devote to
corrupt or unworthy purposes'. Do you devote to corrupt or unworthy
purposes? Or do you indulge 'to offer indiscriminately for sexual
activity especially for money'? If so, then what is denigrating in
accepting the fact about you?
Well, When you consider yourself as a
human, you are by default a sinner. Humans are cursed to be sinners.
God's child like Jesus are supposed to cure human's sins. Hence every
person has done something unworthy of benigness in his/her life.
You can have anger, lose your temper or
write an article like me. You may feel that you have been emotionally
raped, depowered, switched off or being simply insulted. Anger is
self poison, hatred kills self, Forgive your enemy says Jesus. How
you will maintain your
emotional equilibrium with
all these bad emotions? How you will continue what you have been
doing? What about your life? You can become suicidal by such one
instance. How will you live after being labelled as a prostitute?
What you are going to do with your coworker or spouse who has called
you as a prostitute? What you are going to do with the person, who is
not personally responsible for his acts, who has uttered the words
prostitute? Believe me, the person who has called you as prostitute
is not in a mental state to decide to hurt you. He is not an
intelluctual when he calls you a prostitute. He is an animal, what
will you do when an animal hurts you? Can you kill it? Can you tame
it? Can you run away? Can you calm it? Are you going to throw
biscuits for that dog?
Man is a hypocrite and dog
is a friend. You know that, i know that too. How good you are in a
stress interview, can you work with stress, can you face stress? It
is a very delicate situation. You can start building up hatred, anger
and self pity. You may start losing your self esteem. First, let us
see in a duel case. The person pricks another person by head and they
fight to death. How many such duels occur these days? This is an
obsolete technique to handle provocation. Second, Let me see you go
to your house, and turn your anger and agitation to yourself, where
you internalize your anger and disable yourself. I feel you will
commit suicide with such internalized angers. Thirdly, You chose to
release, your anger, you may kick your shoes , slap the wall and
behave asocially. You are succeeding in releasing the anger, but you
are developing such a ritual to discharge your anger. Whenever some
one calls you, provokes you, you must do that ritual to stay cool
headed. Fourth, You do not hear it, you feel as comfortable as
someone praising you. You need to be as pure as god to have such a
response. Bible says humans are sinners and a sinner can have how
much of fourth response? To accept other sinners, one either needs to
be very sinner or very pure. I do not see much of people fitting in
any of these categories. It is possible to hear it, to listen it and
avoid reacting and accumulating. What is required is a conscious
effort, effort to stay cool. People are emotional beings who chose to
do what they want, people have ultimate freedom in chosing their
responses to stimuli.
What can be done?
Boost your mood.
Hear disco
Dance
See TV
Eat
Go out
Go to your relatives
place
Write a sequence of
'Love Live Love Live Love Live' this will remove hatred from your
subconscious.
Contol anger. You will be
distracted , that is why he provokes you. You need to sacrifice a
moment in listening to avoid all these problems. The more you control
your rituals the better it is. Even a simple slapping the wall,
removes control from you, makes you more reactive, gives you lot of
hatred and anger. Avoid reacting, when someone shouts at you to
reduce volume, when youease volume, you are reacting to that
stimuli. Whenever he shouts to reduce volume, your mind will be
triggered to do that ritual. Is that required? Bible says 'Obey me
and not any one else'. Bible says the path of good is very limited
and that of bad is very broad. Are you going to have
Hatred
Anger
Fear
Sociophobia
Asocialness
Sadism
Cruelty
Or are you going to
develop
Self control
Self confidence
Anger management
Tackling difficult situations
Growth in Emotional intelligence