My Heart Goes with These IPL People
Have you noticed them? They are just miserable in the IPL! The Bowlers
I know it’s hard to believe but these men are part of the playing eleven! I don’t know what and how grave their sins were in their previous births. They have sinned a lot –that’s for sure! Otherwise they wouldn’t have been thrashed like this! Think of the measure of self-control they possess, for they haven’t smashed a batting skull yet! The Stars
I am not talking about the batsmen here. (And surely not about the bowlers, for, you know they can’t be stars in the IPL!) These stars are of another kind. They are Bollywood stars who happen to own a percentage of the ownership of the IPL teams. Yes, they are Sharukh Khan, Priety Zinta, Shilpa Shetty etc. Imagine them acting! It’s hard to do so right. They didn’t need to act, for they are Bollywood stars, no? Well, it seems they have lost this privilege! Now, they sit in the galleries for hours. They laugh, they cry, they shed tears, they become hysteric etc. according to the match-situation. In short, they act! You cannot help wondering -what has happened to them? They are actors now! And what a performance, Sirs and Madams! The Scriptwriters
These people are invisible. You haven’t seen them; haven’t heard about them; haven’t smelled them; haven’t touched them and haven’t tested them. They are just beyond the reach of your senses. But they exist -that I assure you! They write the scripts for every ball of an IPL match! Can you imagine how much effort it needs to write a script for 240 balls, -‘No balls’ and ‘Wide balls’ added; - with 12 to 16 heroes (the batsmen), 10 to 14 villains(the bowlers), 3 to 10 major side characters (the umpires, the TV commentators, the TV studio ‘extra innings hosts’) and for 1000 million audience? You cannot! They also write ball by ball reaction-script for the stars! Now think of that! The Cheerleaders and Patented Cultural Dance Troupes
Because it is Indian
Premier League, the cheerleaders cannot wear micros and minis! Shame on that!
And have you noticed the Bhangra Dance troupe for King’s Eleven, Punjab; Lavni Dancers of the Mumbai Indians and Kathakali Performers of Kochi Tuskar? They carry forward their forefathers’ foot-licking habits! The forefathers created the dances for fun and frolic and for the entertainment of the Rajas, Maharajas, Nawabs etc. Now, these people are shaking their body-parts for the team owners aka today’s Raja-Maharajas. Three cheers for them to remain cheerful at least in front of the camera! The News-channel People
Oh! They burn in hell-fire while delivering ‘news’ from the IPL! They observe, they analyse, they comment, they draw conclusions. They make prophecies and become hysteric when their prophecies turn out to be true, to at least some percentage and so on! Just imagine yourself in their position! Can you do all these much ado about the scripted nothings and remain unembarrassed and unashamed? You are not that cool; - don’t fool yourself! The Audience
They say Indians can bear it if Pakistan beat India in the famous Indo-Pak war; but they just cannot bear it when Pakistan beat India in cricket! They are such cricketing patriots! Now, think of patriotism in the IPL. Here, the Mumbai team name themselves Mumbai 'Indians' and the Pune team add 'India' as the last word of the team-name, to prove their identity! My heart practically bleeds for my fellow patriots!