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Shvoong Home>Social Sciences>Selecting Partners Summary

Selecting Partners

Article Summary   by:varghese     Original Author: Prof.P.A.Varghese
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Selecting Partners
Marriages are influenced by the regionalist, linguistic, religious and racial factors and by genetic and emotional dispositions. Even though international, inter lingual and interracial marriages do take place, they make up an exception to the general rule.

A Londoner generally marries a Londoner, not a Parisian. A North American weds a North American and not an Asian. A Hindu usually marries a Hindu, A Christian a Christian and a Moslem a Moslem .
How many women does a man talk to before marriage? Very few indeed.
Some facial features are usually liked at the first instance and the emotional feelings thus aroused usually ends up in marriage.
Of the 3 types of marriages—polyandry, polygamy and monogamy, the one to one marriage is the most common in the world. There must be more problems in polyandry( where one woman is shared by more than one man) and polygamy ( where one husband is shred by more than one woman) than in monogamy. But of late more and more monogamous marriages are ending up in divorces.
The system of marriage one follows depends on the culture and religion one is born into. The type of family life, the stability of the marriage and the number of children one gets will all depend on the prevalent socio economic conditions.

Does one enjoy the freedom to choose one’s partner? In the underdeveloped countries marriages are arranged by the elders of the two families. The bride and the groom have almost no choice. If they get a good match it is a pure luck. Parents look for physical deformities and the social status of the families concerned. Of late, the candidates can exchange a few words in their first meeting and once the marriage is fixed they can talk over the phone-mostly under the watchful eyes of the parents or guardians.
But there is no way to know each other before the marriage. It is only when they live together that they come to know each other. Whether the groom is cruel or kind, villainous of loving, energetic or lazy, intelligent or dull and so on. Whatever way things turn out to be they have to endure the partner till end.

Even in the western countries, disregarding the ample opportunities to meet and get to know each other by spending a lot of time together, the would be bride and groom fail to know or study each other in a mature way before marriage. First attraction is started by a future or two and then everything is dictated by the ensuing romantic feelings. Sexual and romantic emotions usually eclipse the fine senses of judgment. The extent of divorce rates bear testimony to this.
Published: March 04, 2008   
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