Money Can Buy Love
By Victor Ifedi
ACCORDING to obsolete wives' tales, you could not
buy
love
with money. That was a long time ago. At that time
too,
people thought that the earth was flat. Love then
was
said
to be blind. It was the golden age of human
existence
when
social relationships were true and genuine. No
wonder,
great writers devoted so much attention to the
theme of
love. Disraeli wrote: "We are all born for love. It
is
the
principle of existence and its only end." Harold
Emerson in
one of his essays stated: "All mankind love a
lover".The
Christian bible declares: "There is no fear in love
but
perfect love casts out fear".
We witnessed the most dramatic demonstration of
love
when
King Edward VIII of England, later Duke of Windsor,
abandoned the British throne because of the woman
he
loved.
In his farewell address he said: "I have found it
impossible to carry the heavy burden of
responsibility
and
to discharge my duties as king as I would wish to
do
without the help and support of the woman I love."
Today, the old order has changed, giving place to
new.
Contemporary love is entirely based on naira and
kobo.
As
the local musician sings: "Money for hand, back for
ground." This is the current reality in the context
of
modern society. Lord Dewar reflected aptly the
present
situation when he lamented: "Love is an ocean of
emotions
entirely surrounded by expenses."
Ask the sugar daddies and mummies the source of
their
strength and they will readily tell you that it is
their
ability to cash and carry without equivocation. The
young
clerical assistant who lives in a cozy flat
tastefully
furnished knows how her bread is buttered. Her
regular
lavish expenditures, the annual birthday parties,
and
of
course the fabulous summer flights to Europe and
North
America are the direct rewards for her loyalty and
service
to the ageing papa who foots the bills.
Come to think of it, what else matters more than
money
in
this materialistic environment? The handsome
eligible
bachelor who was once an immediate attraction to
damsels is
now despised unless he combines wealth with good
physique.
The brilliant academician who once scored very high
ratings
among pretty undergraduate babies is no more
noticed
unless
he has acquired funds by fair and foul means
including
selling hand-outs to students. The sportsman who
once
charmed school girls for his admirable prowess does
not
come for reckoning any longer unless he has made
enough
dollars from international competitions. Things
have
indeed
changed for better for worse.
How many of today's marriages are founded on true
love?
You
can count them on your bare fingers. The bride
views
the
prospective husband from the angle of his purse or
his
financial potentials. The bridegroom on his part
hunts
for
the young lady with a material future. As the
Indian
young
men search for the brides with the highest dowry,
so
also
the Nigerian females die for the men with the most
promising financial security. That explains why
well
educated ladies prefer the subservient roles of
second,
third and fourth wives in wealthy households. Such
ambitious women change their religions at the drop
of a
pin
to fit into the denominational lifestyle of the
purported
husband. Society weddings have turned into affluent
exhibitions of prosperity rather than traditional
weddings
they are supposed to be. Expectedly, divorces
proliferate
inspite of the pastoral injunctions: "To have and
to
hold
from this day forward, for better for worse, for
richer
for
poorer, in sickness and in health, tolove and to
cherish
till death do us part." "What God has joined
together,
let
no man put asunder." The love of money is the root
of
all
divorces. Women who marry for money are so
insatiable
that
they run after other men who offer them the money
in
abundance especially when their husbands can no
longer
cope.
Yes, money can buy love but it does not sustain it.
The
moment the elixir of money departs from the giver,
love
collapses like a pack of cards. Casanovas who fall
from
grace to grass financially are discarded like old
cloth.
Tom David expressed the issue succinctly: "There is
no
such
thing as romance in our day. Women have become so
brilliant. Nothing spoils a romance so much as the
arrival
of poverty." Relationships which began so happily
flounder
when poverty creeps in. A poor man does not have a
girlfriend, however good his character.
When the French proclaims: "It is love that makes
the
world
go round," he does not refer to the Nigerian kind
of
love.
The Nigerian lady would rather chant: "It is money
that
makes love go round." The impact of money on love
is
patently ephemeral. Money must continue to flow to
keep
relationships on an oven keel.